Unfortunately....I had a moment of jealously

I really hate to admit this, but just this past weekend I had a moment where I was completely jealous of all of my friends that we were attending a pool party with. You see, I was the mom that was having to watch her child every moment, I was the one having to calm down a child that started having a low, and the list goes on. I wanted so badly to be the parent that sat there, watching their child have fun with friends instead I was having to worry about was my child's bandage keeping her pump site OK and intact, was her sugar numbers within range. 

I came across the following by Erma Bombeck and it made me appreciate that God has chosen Jason and I for the task of raising this special little girl because he knew that we could handle it.

by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit. Did you ever wonder how mothers of children with diabetes are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint Matthew."
"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter, Patron Saint Cecilia."
"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a child with diabetes." The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly", smiles God. "Could I give child with diabetes to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel".

"But has she the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I am going to give her has her own world. She has to make it live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps. "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she cannot separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with less than perfect."

"She does not realize it yet, but she is to be envied. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see .... ignorance, cruelty, prejudice ... and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as if she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid air. God smiles. "A mirror will suffice." 

I am grateful for my little girl and her sisters but every now and then....I wish our normal life that existed on November 30, 2008 was the life we had now. 

We have just signed up our team for the JDRF walk in Atlanta on October 15th. We are Morgan's Motley Crew....please join us. Morgan and all the kids just like her NEED a cure.

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